When I first arrived, I got plugged into the Baptist Student Ministry (BSM) where I ended up meeting a ton of people that had a huge impact on me. I'm glad to say that a few of them are still part of my life. By my second semester, though, I was pretty much falling apart mentally. There was a lot of stuff, but the biggest way it presented itself was paranoia. In the midst of this craziness, however, I connected with a girl from the BSM who reached out and brought me into her circle of friends. She made me come out of my dorm room and do stuff with them and when the time came to apply for BSM leadership roles the next year she pretty much told me that I had to do it. I like to say that she saved my life. Certainly, I would still be here without her, but I wouldn't be where I am without her.

I stayed involved in BSM for another two years and held several different leadership roles. I was also the janitor there for a year. I absolutely loved it. It was my home-away-from-home. In a way, it became my identity.

One thing that I felt was unique about my experience is that I had all of these like-minded conservative people that I hung out with, but I also had two or three non-church-going friends back at the dorm that I spent just as much time with. They weren't bad people by any means, just very different from my BSM friends. I think that my exposure to both groups really helped to balance me out and break a lot of the stereotypes (read: naivete) that I grew up with.

[Shoutouts: LB, Jeanna, Nate, Trent, Steven, Kyla, Kelly, Brent, Autumn, Dave, Cory, Ryon, Brendan, Tony Macaroni, Keith, Tonya, Jana, David, Krista, and a host of others]

The summer before college was something of a turning point. I was geared up and enrolled for classes in the fall. I already had my ID card and everything. Then I went to church camp for a week. It had a profound effect on me in a number of ways and left me very confused. I came away from it thinking that my plan was all wrong - but unsure of what was "right". In an overly emotional moment I actually said to God, "I don't know what I'm supposed to do, so you tell me and I'll do it. For the rest of my life, whatever you want me to do, I'm in." And I kind of left it at that.

Then there was this wild experience. I was hanging out one night and this song sort of came to me out of nowhere and I wrote it down. A couple of days later I went into my guitar lesson and offered to play this new song for my instructor (he was way cool. His name was Darren. I wish I knew his last name so that I could look him up now.) Anyway, by halfway into the song, this guy is weeping. And when it's all said and done, he says, "That song was for me." Then he proceeds to prophesy over me - go back to yesterday - conservative, fundamental - we don't do prophesy, unless it is firmly rooted in the Old Testament. (Side note: I hate that "prophe-see" and "prophe-sigh" are spelled the same way). He tells me that God says to stay the course that I'm on - that is, go to college where I'm registered - and everything will unfold from there... Then he prayed for me and the sinus pressure I had been suffering for several days was immediately gone.

I mean, what are you supposed to do with that?

So, I went to college.

[After writing this and moving on to the next episode, I felt a real need to recognize those people who played a huge part in each stage - call me sentimental or whatever - it's important for me to remember them. I'm sure I'll forget someone every time around but, oh well: Kristen, Nick, Jeng, Courtney, Darren]

I grew up in what we refer to as a "Christian home." We were fanatically involved in church. Sunday morning: of course. Sunday night: obviously. Wednesday night: is there any other option? But also a host of other activities from cleaning the building on Saturdays to Gym Night on Tuesdays. We were at church a lot. For the record, we're talking old school, fundamental, King James ONLY (because that's how God wrote it) church - you know the kind.

I also spent 8 of my 12 grade-school years in private Christian school. (I have a wealth of opinions about sending your kids to private school, but I don't have a 100% firm stance on whether it is a good or bad idea.)

My parents got divorced when I was 13. I ended up going to a (relatively) much more laid back church where I made some truly great friends. I also ended up in public school for 11th and 12th grades, but it was absolutely the suburbs so I wasn't shaken much from my conservative roots.

So that's what I was working with when I went to college...

March 2008 I went to work for a church.

July 2009 I went to work for a different church.

Dec 2010 I was unemployed.

May 2011 I started a new job in corporate America.

People are often intrigued by this. People who used to know me are surprised that I'm not working for a church. People who know me now are surprised that I did. It's been a strange journey.

When I was fired, I didn't talk about it too much and I certainly didn't blog about it. One, I needed to process my own feelings about it. Two, I didn't want any potential employers to think that I was bad-mouthing my former employer.

Finally, I'm ready to tell my story. I feel like I need to tell my story. I hesitate about how far back to go, so I'll try to keep it as current and relevant as possible, but I will be going all the way back, just so you have some context.

So, that's what you have to look forward to in the coming weeks.

1) No Schedule.

2) Only relevant content. More personal. No "filler".

This post is my first step toward that. Stay tuned. New post coming: whenever I decide (see #1 above).

In case you missed the announcement last week on FB and Twitter - I made a record called Caroline. I hereby invite you to listen to and purchase it (Click on Caroline . Hooray!!

Friday:

• Work
• Pizza Inn with the Family
• Target adventure

Saturday:

• Family trip to Cabela's for Lincoln to see the animals. He had a good time and it was a lot closer than the zoo
• Nap
• Visited the Robbins' new house and Lincoln took some toys for Andrew to play with
• Played at the Botanical Gardens Park in Grapevine

Sunday:

• Church
• Caught a few minutes of the Philadelphia game
• Grocery shopping
• Changed the oil and rotated tires on car #1
• Family hangout and Cowboys game at the DeHarts

I Wish it Would Rain by The Temptations - very nearly the best pop music track ever recorded. The incomparable David Ruffin on lead vocals with the classic Temptations lineup behind him (Eddie Kendrick, Paul Williams, Melvin Franklin and Otis Williams). One of Ruffin's last tracks wit the group. The story behind the song is far more tragic than the song itself. It is a masterpiece.

and here's a bonus Gillian Welch track just because